You have ashes, you have lost things in life. We all have! My whole life burned to the ground in 2018 which I will talk about later.
Ashes are a sign of something that was. It has gone and now only ashes remain. Once it could have been something amazing, ornate and valuable. God brought me revelation on the beauty of ashes this year which I wanted to share in the hope it will help you find use for yours too.
I have had a few things turned to ash in my life, a business, a marriage, friendships even a car! In life many things can go up in flames, our ministry, careers, friendships, homes, families, marriages, investments, theology etc.
This is me and my wife in Autumn 2017 - We were newly pregnant with our first, I was pastoring a church, leading in a few other churches, had a lovely home and many friends.
Six months later by April 2018 I was sleeping in a car, jobless, wife in another relationship, friends all but vanished and meeting weekly with a counsellor going through a complete mental breakdown.
IT WAS A BIG FIRE!!! 🔥
I will write about the implosion of our lives another time (oh, please follow so you don't miss stuff!) All I am saying at this point is that I had a LOT OF ASHES!
Ok so quick few thoughts on the sources of ashes:
They may be a sign something bad - God brough destruction and things to ash Malachi 4:3 You will tread down the wicked, for they will be ashes under the soles of your feet on the day which I am preparing,” says the Lord of hosts.
They may be neutral - Elisha burned a plough before he could move forward. It wasn't bad but it was burned as a sign that Elisha was committed to a different future.
Most of the things burned in the Bible are good, they are offerings which by law had to be good and without defects - the offerings to God burnt up as a sign of repentance or worship.
So what did God reveal to me about ashes that I hope can help you?
The first step is to USE THEM!
In every case above the issue is that ashes form no useful purpose other than to mark as a reminder…
If you have lost something to the flames of life then I am really sorry. If you feel sharing your pain will help please message me!
Firstly, when big things burn the ashes can be stay hot for a long time. This is ok. In fact it is useful to ensure you process things properly and give yourself time. Trying to move things too quickly can cause more pain. Others might try to touch them and get burned too. If you have lost something big like a loved one or a marriage, then those ashes are going to take a good while to cool down. My advice is just to let people know that these ashes may need to stick around a while. That they can still cause you pain and so you're treating them with caution. Don't try and move them too fast!
Secondly, ashes are a sign of your pain. If you are still in mourning then keep the ash handy to dab on your forehead for others to see you pain. Wearing our grief is out of fashion, many funerals people now wear bright colours. This is nice to celebrate their lives. Yet, we must also get better at embracing peoples pain. When my wife left I experienced pain for over 2 years, I still feel the odd twinge. One of the things many well meaning people said even just months after was that I 'need to move on'. This was less about me and more that my pain caused them discomfort. My advice is to find those who will put the ash on themselves too instead of wanting to clean it all up and make you presentable! These people will just sit with you and say, 'yeah it is throughly sh*t, I know you will get through and that God's with you but right now it is ok to feel totally rubbish and I feel rubbish for you because I care about you.'
Thirdly, ashes are a sign of penitence. Perhaps you helped cause the fire... This can be particularly painful and so you use the ashes to cover yourself with when speaking with God to show your repentant heart or brokenness. You don't want to throw them or 'move on' out of respect to God and others. Ash Wednesday is a day marked out in the Christian calendar for repentance where people mark their foreheads with ash.
Esther 4:1 'When Mordecai learned of all that had been done, he tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and ashes, and went out into the city, wailing loudly and bitterly.'
The second step is to LOOSE THEM!
Though there is pain and penitence there is no worship in ashes themselves. There can be worship in the burning of sacrifice but not in ashes.
There is no new story in Ashes. There is no life or even the possibility of life it is just evidence of what was. God's command is to be fruitful. We can't do that with ashes.
A fire can not be lit in ashes. It won’t take. They have to be cleared so the the new fire can breathe. God knows this (Exodus 27:3 Make all its utensils of bronze—its pots to remove the ashes, and its shovels...) He had part of the temple design include specific tools to remove the ash.
Be brave and LOOSE THEM
Scatter the ashes of your loss so that a different fire can be lit a fire of worship of sacrifice to God. I don’t mean a song, or offering in the narrow sense, though it can include that… I mean our lives are living sacrifices, we live out our lives for His glory. So as you loose the ashes of defeat and loss you make way for the fire of heaven to consume you once again.
God's promise to us is to give us a replacement for our ashes in the beautiful words of Isaiah
...to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair... - Isaiah 61:3
Ashes stifle growth and life when left in a heap. HOWEVER, actually help fertilise when sprinkled on soil. Ashes are highly recommended to be sprinkled sparingly on soil to add calcium for plants. I have felt the benefits of this myself, the ashes of loss have without doubt helped me to become better soil for Jesus to work with. I know I can be more fruitful now with this loss sprinkled in to my life to draw wisdom from, to increase empathy and much more. Though the bulk must be thrown, a little sprinkled in to our lives enriches us.
I hope you feel encouraged that when the time is right to clear the ash from the altar of your life so you can burn something new, something pleasing and sweet for God…
Please do connect, I love would love to hear from you and share this if you feel it will help others.
Big love!
joss
Side note: I had a prophetic word from a guy in my church called Craig in 2019. I was new to the church and he didn't really know me at all at the time but the word was great I will post about it soon!
Ash Wednesday by Jennifer Balaska
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